An Introduction

To those that read this, or have it read to them; I hope they all remember that in life, I have lived. And while most of my living has taken place in the imagination and wonderment of my childhood, those moments resonate with me in my adult life. I find myself daydreaming about my childhood where some would day dream about their future. I dwell in my past because many of my younger years were some of my happiest. I have my parents to thank for this, and my brothers and sister. All of the children who surround me now, my nieces and nephews, bring me happiness and joy that only children can bring.

I've come to another moment in my life, as all moments come and go. It seems some are bolded in heavy black letters; other moments only slightly italicized. Some moments are partially faded, others barely a whisper on the wind, not even held long enough to be put down in print. There are memories, strong and colorful; others in black and white; some only in pieces, like a film missing bits off its reel. Sometimes my memories come in pieces, or they seem like dreams, and maybe some of them are. 

My memories don't really flow in chronological order. My life is an ever-changing shadow because of this. My earliest memory is of my younger brother choking on a hard candy in the bank. I don't remember how old we were exactly, only that I was younger than five because we still lived in our old house, so he must have been four. I remember him coughing, and my mom hitting his back. In front of her in line was a woman who said “no, don't do that, it will only make it worse”.  There is a point in that memory where I remember her saying she was a doctor, but I don't know where it was placed in regards to the only words I actually remember seeing her speak.  I remember spitting my own candy out across the bank and I remember it distinctly sliding underneath the terminal where members of the bank would fill out their bank slips. I don't remember anything else from that day, but I do remember in the days following that I thought everything I ate I would choke on. I remember specifically thinking I was going to choke while eating cheerios at the dining room table in the old house, with those pink curtains covering the window behind me.